Again I have to thank Guybrush57 and Aullori for their wise words on the differences between the way men and women think. Both are long-term, happily married women who have obviously learnt the art of understanding our similarities and differences.
I had been getting quite stressed at the lack of contact from P until these wise women stepped in. After reading their comments I calmed down completely. I stopped being pessimistic and thinking the worst and decided to go with the flow and wait to see what developed.
Last night came the email from P. He explained how busy he’s been (and I already knew it was a particularly busy time of year for him) and wanted to know if there was a chance to meet before I went overseas. I know he will be flat out busy for at least another week (including most probably both the weekends). Then I have a busy weekend after than. That leaves only a very small window of opportunity for us to catch up prior to my departure for Arizona.
Actually, much as I want to see him, that isn’t the issue. The fact is that I went into judgemental thinking, something I usually pride myself on not succumbing to. I suddenly projected all these motives and manipulations onto him. This obviously tells a lot more about me and my thinking and approach to life than it says about P. I have been guilty of judging (and almost sentencing) without hearing from the defence.
This is an opportunity for me to really examine my own thinking, my own behaviour (because it must reflect something of myself) and my own motives and manipulations. I have obviously a suspicious mind when it comes to personal affairs involving men. This is not the person I want to be. I always tend to give the benefit of the doubt except in these circumstances. I think I have had the experiences in the past that have hurt me due, at least in part, to my own ways of thinking and behaving. Time to change all that!
Wow, another learning opportunity given to me by the universe.
Thanks!
Well first off, I would like to say enjoy your travel to Arizona.
The beauty of all the lands.
I hope you will post your pictures.
They always tell a beautiful story.
I think it is great , that you are learning more about yourself.
A better understanding of oneself, then leads to a better understanding of others.
A favorite saying of mine ” No expectations, no disappointment.”
Safe travels I will miss your posts while you are gone
Brightest blessings
Thank you for the compliment that was very nice. I think everything we do teaches us something – however there is something special about “talking” about life online with others. Rarely is there judgement and usually a lot of conversations about the self. It is a magical road we are all on – indeed.
99ppp, your favourite saying – “no expectations, no disappointment” is absolutely spot on for me. It is exactly what I am learning about right now. I had a trial run with S a while ago where I built up expectations despite saying to him we should have none. I stuffed up that one, this time I want to get it right. Very wise my friend. And I do hope to still be able to post sometimes while away.
Aullori, it is great online isn’t it? We feel much freer to let our real thoughts and feelings out because we don’t have to face each other I guess. I do talk like this to some of my friends face to face but I think perhaps we judge each other more as we have an emotional connection. And know each others histories
I do learn a lot from you so thanks again.
New learning leads to new growth, embrace it! Huggles love.