Mindlessness

Saturday evening. I’ve been here a week and I can’t quite believe it. Tomorrow is the last day of the conference and I fly home the day after that. I leave here Monday but don’t get home until Wednesday because of the time difference.

I’ve realised that my lower mind has almost switched off during this week which is a wonderful change. A lot of the presentations have been at a very high, abstract level - and I can’t comprehend the concepts with my concrete mind. But there has been alignment and meditation every day too and somehow I think I’ve tuned in at a higher level. It hasn’t filtered down to the brain consciousness in many cases but it has gone in. I realise that I’ve not done any of my usual analysis and planning and general monkey mind business (chitta, chatter). My mind has somehow calmed and stilled and to some extent I am just being. I only realised this today.

Having Bekki here with me has been good as she has kept me grounded every day. We’ve not spent a huge amount of time together as I spend most of the day and evening in the conference and she has been doing her own thing. She has been doing enough mental work for both of us I believe. She’s somehow energetically freed me from the need to process things myself. This is kind of unique for me. Her being here has been good too, because I am kind of shy when I don’t know people and I only know one other person here (well I know a few more now of course) so knowing that Bekki is here to talk to during downtime from the conference has helped me feel secure.

I wonder how this will translate when I get home. Will my ever active mind start up again? I dare say it will but the respite for a week has been a wonderful, unexpected gift. All in all I’ve been feeling very good this week. On the whole I think I’ve maintained my emotional tranquillity pretty well all things considered.

I do miss all of you very much - I want to catch up on what you’ve all been posting for the past ten days or so but that will have to wait until I get home. Then I hope to get back into posting daily again. I’m sure work will take over that intention fairly soon but I can try

I’ve just been filled with a feeling of gratitude and realise how lucky I am in so many ways. I’ve a new appreciation for P’s role in my life - he’s often been here with me this week ;-)  I can feel him around me at times. It doesn’t matter that there is an entire huge ocean between us. There is a connection there that is much greater than words or physical location.

I’ve also had discussions here about various projects (multimedia and online education) that I will hopefully get involved with as time goes by.

I miss you my friends. I look forward to talking with you again soon.

Namaste.
Zen