Finally I am having fun in my life. Being a Capricorn I seem to live life backwards. I am living out experiences that many have in their teens and early twenties – back then I was too serious and intense to really enjoy myself.
I am also learning what it is like to actually be nurtured and cherished by someone. I am discovering how to openly, honestly and respectfully communicate in a deep and meaningful way. I’m learning not to hold things back, not to brood or stew. I am finding that no matter what I do or say or how I do or say it, I am accepted, forgiven, respected, admired, empathised with and yes, even loved. Regardless.
Far from pulling away from me the opposite has occurred. For once I actually feel I am the one least engaged in a relationship. That is bizarre especially in the circumstances. And yet, I feel the intensity coming at me is more than that going back. And I love it. It is empowering to encounter this.
I am being given affection, understanding, empathy, gifts, deep communication and connection. I am experiencing passion, intensity and wild, crazy zaniness. There is lots of laughter, some tears, dancing, singing, living…
I need this. It is a neccessary step on my path of self growth. Surely it doesn’t always have to be hard work and pain? For now I am living in the moment, perhaps acting a bit recklessly at times, but I am feeling, experiencing, being. Yes I am still in my head rather too much but that is changing too. I thought I analysed a lot! I’m not the only one.
There is also much soul searching going on on both sides. There is a compulsion to this situation that may well pass with a bit more time. A lot of things won’t change and all of this will come to an end. Doesn’t everything? That is no reason to not go into something. Fear of it ending, fear of being hurt. Nobody truly lives if they live always within safety and comfort zones. What I am gaining, what we both are gaining, is immeasurable.
This may be a repeat pattern in some ways but it is like nothing I’ve ever known before. I am filled with gratitude for this opportunity.
That’s awesome.
Good for you!
Thanks Jessica
Remember what Oscar Wilde said in The Picture of Dorian Grey? The best way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Only then can you control it and not be controlled by it.
Toni, I like that line of thinking
I actually think there is a lot of truth in it too.
Would you believe that I’m going through through the same situation right now, but from a different position? It seems a strange coincidence, that’s why I was curious about your perspective on this in the first place. Love is a feeling that has to be cherished whenever it comes into being, isn’t it?
Thats more like it Zen! This is it! Enjoy
Lots of Love Energy your way!
Enreal, thankyou as always for your positive support and outlook. All that love right back at ya!
Hello Zen,
I bet you know what I am thinking.
Anyway it is nice to share this with you.
All the best to you.
Where oh where is my zenuria? where oh where did she go?
Yeah, me wonders too. Should we put together a posse?